Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Goodbye ain't Au Revoir

The pianist and I are selling our home we have lived in for 32 years, since, it is now too much for us to look after! We want to turn the page and start afresh in our mid 70's. Still, one's decisions in these matters are always conflicted with the losses that we will experience despite the pragmatic and sensible approach. It is always a difficult matter when one ages, to choose to march to the tune of sense, or sensibility! Once the page is turned we cannot go back. Whether it is "stuff" that makes one hesitate or, "stuff that really represents memories", I'm not sure? Once sold, all control is relinquished to the new owner! " Will he cut down my sweet bay tree ( Laurus nobilis) I have nourished over 20 years?" " Could I put a codicil in the sales agreement that it stay?" The real estate agent would have "a hairy" ! "Would they tear the house apart and change it's character totally, revise the studio and greenhouse?" " Would they prize the same things we do? " Of course they will change things to their own style and so they should. We said to one another a year ago "Are we ready to do this?" and agreed we were. Over time, once the loss of anything valued may be imminent , reappraisal occurs, since the putative event now becomes more real. " Maybe we can manage if we can't get our price." " It's not as much work as we thought. " " Now that we have it in show condition it's so nice." I have many friends that have waited too long and become too old to turn the page effectively. Their properties have deteriorated badly and they cannot cope with the move and the losses. I understand how hard all this is. It comes down to doing the right thing at the right time and the only matter of real importance in life is relationships, not "stuff". Memories will continue; after all they are memories!


  1. Have you read Gail's post about leaving her garden?

  2. I just turned 75 and have reminisced a bit. Having left the house and garden 6 years ago and residing in a condo since, has been ok. Time is still spent outdoors, walking to all things around town, in the parks and on the beach.
    I recently blabbed on this a bit:
    Viewing Life and Society at 75

    Good luck on your page turning I'm sure it will be great for you.

  3. Hi, Diana (Elephant's Eye) sent me here....I am so glad she did; I've really enjoyed looking around and reading your past posts. I've begun thinking about eventually leaving my garden, but we aren't ready to do that quite yet! Good luck.